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I hadn't been to the dentist for a while, and some recent changes in my schedule prompted me to remedy that. It felt like the responsible thing to do.

Then I went in.

I don't think that any other kind of appointment so consistently makes you feel less responsible.

Like . . . You can go into the doctor's office with 15 years' worth of clogged arteries and a black lung, and they'll calmly tell you that everything will be alright with a bit of diet and exercise. "And maybe lay off the brewskies a little."

But with the dentist, it's full doom and gloom. Dentists have a reputation for sadism, but I've never seen them indulge in the physical kind. Emotional sadism, though? Maybe that's why they seem so motivated to make you feel like damned trash for the occasional skipped flossing.

Bonus Question!

Best song about dental care?

Monty Python probably had one, but I'm going to give it to "Shiny Teeth" from "Fairly Oddparents", sung by the most attractive dude from NSync who isn't Justin Timberlake.

Actually, I don't care if the Tim's more famous. He's fine, but Chris still seems to naturally be the prettiest. Maybe it's because I could never look past Justin's hair.

Copyright © 2011, Jaymes Buckman and David Aaron Cohen. All rights reserved. In a good way.