Head and Shoulder

Here's what happened.

My shoulders are messed up. Not too bad. But they dislocate with some recurrence. It started with a seizure years ago, and one dislocation makes subsequent ones easier. They're just loose, my man. I've been working on it, but solving it isn't really feasible without surgery, and surgery's gross. It also has its own uncertainties. But I actually have a trapezius now! That's a win.

Anyway, on Monday, I think that I found another new way to dislocate my shoulder, and this one's probably the weirdest. There have been a  bunch. I was dancing about as I was waiting for the train, and in this process, I briefly hopped up on a bench. As I jumped down, I banged my head into a sign, which wasn't a big issue for my head, but somehow the recoil or something knocked my shoulder out, and it took a bit of a while for me to pop it back in, diring which I was hobbling about in a pained hunch. I know that my brand is basically being the weirdest guy in the room, but it must have been especially strange to see someone hit his head and immediately start struggling with his shoulder. It was odd for me, and I at least had some idea of what happened.

Bonus Question! 

Are the Gyllenhaals the Cusacks of this century?

Grimly Phoenix

Just saw "Dark Phoenix". Can't understand the hate. It was a fun X-Men film filled with classic X-Men nonsense. Like "Apocalypse". On a tonal level, I did prefer "Apocalypse", but that's  because it was more uplifting, and my own tastes might have liked that to be the end point. But I'm also the guy who used to end the Ziggy Stardust album on "Suffragette City" because "Suicide" seemed too dour to end on, and now that's one of my favourite songs.

But it's pretty rare for a dude to get a second chance at seeing his vision through without interference, and that's what Kinberg got for this after the complications of "Last Stand". He rose from the ashes of that and made his Phoenix play here.

I will say that the X-Men uniform popped better onscreen than I expected, though I still would have preferred the wilder costumes that were teased at the end of "Apocalypse". What else popped? Mystique's hair. That  coif was radical. It could have come from a bottle called "Radical Red". Pure comic book colour. Cheers for that. And cheers to Kinberg for managing to convince her to come back for endless hours of makeup application.

And I realise now that Tye Sheridan might have won the casting call in large part by virtue of his mouth. That blind pout is pure Cyclops. I loved Marsden in the old movies, but he might have almost been too stylish for the role. He might have made me like Scott more than I should have. But Tye's performance is incredibly honest.

Also. At one point, the X-Men are antagonised by the Mutant Control Unit or whatever, with big letters on their outfits that read "MCU", which seems appropriate after all the legal issues between the Marvel Cinematic Universe and Fox's X-Men franchise.

And the ending reminded me of the epilogue to "Dark Knight Rises", which mainly had the effect of making me want to watch a conversation between Xavier and Michael Caine. It doesn't even have to be with Alfred. Any Michael Caine.

Bonus Question!

How was the last season of "Jessica Jones"?

She's not my favourite character of the Netflix Defenders, but for some reason, her show always goes down smoothest.

Forgetful Detecting

I kept forgetting Bill Nighy was in "Detective Pikachu" before I finally saw it. But he is. And it was.

Awesome. It was awesome.

I'd heard people say that it was weak outside of seeing live Pokemon, but I might tend towards the inverse. It was a fun adventure film outside of the visuals, which are never my main draw to a movie. The Pokemon looked good, but they didn't seem miraculously realistic. They just had an overall design that brought their level of detail up, but I'd still say Jar-Jar and company looked more natural in a real world than anything here. That's no knock against the film. I liked how it maintained a bit of the cartoony feel of the franchise, but my experience was at odds with a lot of what I'd heard about the film.

Anyway, it's a fun time. And the ending was an adorable surprise.

Best Eevee?

Sylveon. Because fairies.

Dirty Rocking Scoundrels

I just saw "The Hustle", which turned out to be a remake of "Bedtime Story", which I haven't seen, and "Dirty Rotten Scoundrels", which I loved. But I just discovered that "Scoundrels" got Steve Martin and Mikey Caine after a proposition to et Bowie and Jagger fell through, and now I want that nonexistent film hard. We could have had the cinematic equivalent of their "Dancing in the Streets" cover! Eh. Lass.

Bonus Question!

Mick Jagger the street fighting man or Mick Jagger who dances in the street? Place of battle is the street.

Well, one might expect the guy who's known for fighting in streets to win a fight in a street, but there were some pretty impressive kicks in that other video. Although they might've come from David Bowie.

Spring Beaching

I saw "The Beach Bum". It was basically like watching a whole movie about Sam Rockwell's Zaphod Beeblebrox soundtracked by turning on a classic rock station at random. Which is to say . . . It was alright for me.

Directed by the dude who did "Spring Breakers". I don't leave movies early often, but when I realised that it wouldn't stop being a series of disconnected scenes with little salient dialogue, I ran across town to see the G.I. Joe sequel instead. Which was delightful. With The Rock.

Bonus Question!

Best Beach Boy?

In high school, my default answer was Dennis, but I haven't examined that since.

Avengers 4-Ever After

Restlessness lost! I was worried about being able to sit through the running time of "Endgame" despite fervent desire to see it,  which drove me further to see it with company in an extra effort to fight off that discomfort. But I probably would have managed without that. Honestly, the pacing might have suited me more than that of "Infinity War" despite the increased length.

Another mild surprise?

I liked the quantum suits more than I thought I would when the Avengers actually put them on. The colour palette still isn't my favourite, but it lent a bit of a Japanese super squad effect to things. Like Power Rangers or Voltron. That kind of thing. It mitigated the loss of those diverse costumes with more inherent appeal.

And Rob Downey basically felt like Ian Malcolm for the first 15 minutes, which hit me with a bit of desire to see Stark hang with the Grandmaster. Though even when the first "Iron Man" came out, I felt a sort of affinity between Jeff and Downey. Anyway.

Also, isn't this around the 3rd anniversary of that comic  where Cap first hailed Hydra? It was amusing to hear that line cheered in the movie after its harsh decrial in the books.

Ultimately? Ridiculous. But not ridicilulous like the Ultimate universe's analogous chapter ender Ultimatum, which was a whole other kind of ridiculousness. This was far more satisfying, in part because it still left a full world that allows for all sorts of future stories to be told. After Ultimatum, that universe felt slightly like the first bit of "Endgame" where the whole world was depressed after the snap. People say the movie's take a lot from Ultimate Marvel, but regardless of that claim's truth, they're better at wiping the slate clean. For one thing, they actually clean it instead of smashing it to bits.

And hey. The longest paragraph of my "Endgame" post was only tangentially related to the film. Seems on brand.

Also! In being a saga ender with an expressive green giant, a bunch of time travel in sevice of fixing a broken world, and a notably attractive character that got fat and lazy, "Endgame" really reminded me of "Shrek Forever After". And because "Endgame" had a mellow Kinks song in it, I was also reminded of my friend's insistence on listening to his favourite "Waterloo Sunset" in the car as he drove me from the Shrek movie. I was also listening to a lot of Kinks before I went to see "Endgame", but it wasn't the mellow stuff.

Bonus Question!

Best Hawkeye moment?

Jeremy Renner has his own kind of endearing charm, but it's not that of comic book  Clint Barton. That's fine, but Jer's "totally awesome" line felt like the closest thing to the Hawkeye of the page.

With the possible exception of pictures of young Jeremy Renner.

Hella Boys

So. New Hellboy movie.

Here's the thing. Guillermo del Toro has inimitable charm, and the same can be said for Ron Perlman. Though the films they made together largely predated the modern superhero movie landscape and its fairly consistent ability to distill the outlandish glories of its source material into quality cinema, they were well made, well performed, and filled with the eccentric warmth of their director. It's hard not to want more of that.

But if you put that aside, 2019's "Hellboy" is a fun romp too.  Some of the marketing made it seem overly grom, which probably would have made me miss the Guillermo works, but honestly, the actual film didn't feel too different in overall tone from the previous stuff. The biggest difference was probably the preponderance of hard rock in the soundtrack, which seems like something Guill wouldn't do too much, but I don't actually remember. I walked in slightly late, but the first scene I saw was some sort of masked wrestling match, and professional wrestling is probably a good point of comparison for the film's feel. Machismo, hard rock, and a kind of endearing ridiculousness leavened by an implicit absence of self-seriousness.

Bonus Question!

Best boy from Hell?

Daimon Hellstrom, Son of Satan!

Not actually the son of Satan! But still the son of one of many demons who claim that name in the Marvel universe! Also probably has a portal to Hell in his kitchen or something! Also called Hellstorm!

Shazamming

Just saw "Shazam". It's a movie about a child mind in an adult body with sparkly power. I couldn't miss it.

Also, it followed "Spider-Man 2" in the classic superhero movie tradition of having a villain who looks like a dude in Matrix cosplay.

One other thing. The combination of the marketing slogan "Just Say The Word" in combination with the throwback 80s feel makes me think of Phil Collins's "Sussudio", and I don't know if that was intentional. In any case, it's my head canon theme song for the movie.

Bonus Question!

Are Redditors in Reddit's Star Wars section Jeditors?

Alien Slaying

I finally saw "Captain Marvel", and I really just want to say that I loved the look of the Skrulls. For real. They reminded me of random villains from "Buffy", which totally feels appropriate for an emotionally oblique blond heroine in the 90s.

Also, these movie versions do a good job of looking distinct from Thanos, who's always basically looked like a Skrull with a purple tan and an Infinity Gauntlet full of protein powder.

Bonus Question!

Best flavour of protein powder?

I've been swearing by maple syrup pancake, but the new Reese's peanut butter cup kind intrigues me. Can anyone attest to it?

Flyndral

So. Pretty excited for "Shazam".

Before this, I was aware of Zach Levi's history in the Thor movies with the character of Fandral. I didn't realise that he was also Flynn in the Tangled franchise. Still doing it in the ongoing series and Kingdom Hearts even. Which means that he's played two fantastical characters inspired by Errol Flynn? That speaks well of the dude to my mind. Now I want to see his Shaz even more.

Bonus Question!

"Tangled" versus "Frozen"?

Both are good, but I was more receptive to "Tangled" at the time. Flynn was probably a big part of that. But I think Elsa's become my favourite princess since. We'll see how I feel when the sequel arrives. Also, hey! Disney cartoon  with a theatrical sequel! Yay!