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Kitchen Matters

I’ve been seeing these pictures on the trains. Obviously, I think that people’s eating habits are their own business. What they do in the privacy of their own kitchens should be their decision. Beyond that, I just take issue with their argument. “Why love one but eat the other?” People eat cats, guy! You’re basically saying, “Hey! Why not eat the other?” That’s only one result of this disgustingly fallacious advertising campaign. Do you know what happens when you go and start equating random animals with each other? Cats and chickens. Really? Soon people are going to be making violins from baby chickens. Nice job, my man. There’s another one with dogs and cows. I can only assume that the vegans want more people to be like Cruella de Vil.

I’m also unable to avoid noticing the lack of diversity in these campaigns. Have these people even been to lobster restaurants? They complain about the cruel conditions of cows in distant bunkers. Cows are cramped? These lobsters climb and crawl over each other until the customers who eat beside their tanks pick their favourite for dinner. I don’t care about the favourites. I don’t eat lobster. It’s a lot of work for a very small amount of satisfaction. You get a few morsels of tiny meat over 40 minutes of dissection. Bad value in my opinion. I ignore most citrus fruits for the same reason. Blood oranges are the exception. They are good. Good. But I can only find them for a couple of months in a year. Anyway. My point. I don’t care for the customers’ favourites, but I like the little guys that get to the top of the pile. I salute them when I can. It’s not even particularly vicious. The guys below them don’t really seem to mind. It’s just the accepted organisation. There’s a mutual respect.

Copyright © 2011, Jaymes Buckman and David Aaron Cohen. All rights reserved. In a good way.