Spider Time

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Spiders, man. Listen. This is my main problem. Actually, it’s definitely not my main problem. Its place on the list can be found somewhere, though. It’s not the clearest list. List of spider problems.

Anyway.

When one walks into a room, one can take certain precautions to find any potential arthropod presence in the room. Scan the walls. Ceilings. Cast gazes on all surfaces. If this reveals nothing, the room is probably safe.

This is not the case for spiders. Nefarious? Indeed. They are not content to exist obviously. They are not limited to solid surfaces. They are not even consistently visible. We’ve met the little guys with the translucent bodies. A spider is wont to hang imperceptibly in the middle of a room at orifice height without any warning for anyone who chooses to walk in on legs that are not excessively numerous.

Constant vigilance.

Do you understand? I’m no intermittent sentry. It’s always spider time. I even have special clocks for it. In my mind. I don’t even need to check them anymore. It’s like that feeling one gets when one looks at one’s watch and thinks, “Hey! It’s the exact time that I guessed!” I always have that feeling with spider time.

Because it’s always spider time.

And I know that. Always.

Spider time!

Copyright © 2011, Jaymes Buckman and David Aaron Cohen. All rights reserved. In a good way.