Superspy Science

I was watching “Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.”  again, and the biggest emphasis on this episode’s technology was placed around its battery life. There’s a finite amount that can be done at this point to distinguish fictional communication devices from reality’s smartphones and the like, and charge duration seems to be one of a few qualities that tells people that they’re not actually living in old science fiction

That probably contributes to the decreased focus on outlandish technology in the newer Bond films too. At least he still has car missiles, though. Or he would. He just happened to be out of ammunition in this one.

Bonus Question!

"Why does a man choose the life of an assassin?" "Well, it was that or the priesthood."

In either case, you can get a biretta. 

Extra Bonus!

How was it?

It's probably my favourite of the Craig saga.

Orchid Jams

I love the opening of Ram Jam's "Black Betty". I'm less enthusiastic about the rest of the song, and I often stop listening after the prelude when it happens to play on my phone. But I just realised that The White Stripes' "Blue Orchid", which has a similar sort of beginning, delivers a kind of experience that the introduction of "Black Betty" might have implied in my imagination. Now I'm thinking that I don't even need the Ram Jam track in my library anymore.

But I'm keeping "All for the Love of Rock N' Roll". Something about shoes.

Bonus Question!

Best Betty? All of them.

Scarwalker

The two currently extant "Star Wars" trilogies contain intentional points of resonance that serve to strenthen the bonds between the halves, but another tie, imperfect and possibly inadvertent, just occurred to me.

Mark Hammill was involved in some accident after the shooting of his first film in the saga, and this left him with some facial scarring that was apparently beyond an efficient solution by the makeup department of "The Empire Strikes Back". Instead of ignoring it or allowing the audience to assume that some random altercation had damaged Skywalker's demeanour, the script was modified to explicitly explain the changed face. That's the reason for that encounter in the beginning with the Abominable Snow Monster of the North.

Hayden Christensen was not visibly injured between the filming of his two "Star Wars" movies, but Anakin shows up in the latter with a distinct scar that gets no cinematic explanation. As Luke's could have been in a world without that beast battle on Hoth, this was the result of a battle outside of the movies. It just seems mildly odd to explicitly address one actor's slight disfigurement with an entire sequence in the story and then deliberately add one to the character's son without similar narrative focus.

And that's quite charming. 

Bonus Question! 

Best Scar? Jeremy Irons. 

Dynamo Love Style

You know that thing I do where I wander through the universe and naturally attract lovely phenomena? Well, here’s the result of a recent occurence.

Someone stopped me on the street, and now I'm the soundtrack for her most excellent workout video!

Bonus Question!

Where do they get all those wonderful clothes?

More from the video’s featured fashion line can be found at http://www.designerfate.com. Maybe you want to get some new pants or something?

Wand of Trudoom

I don’t really pay attention to politics? But I did notice that Justin Trudeau got elected on Monday. Maybe it was bolstered by the dude’s ability to strike a photogenic figure, but when I picked up this week’s issue of Bendis’s new Iron Man series, which features the return of Doctor Doom, I couldn’t avoid thinking that its rendition of Victor’s freshly flawless demeanour made him look like Justin.

This is not a staff of office.

But Doom didn’t just lose his scars and his mask. Apparently, the quondam monarch of Latveria also lost control of his country just as Trudeau won leadership over his. Point to Trudeau? I guess? I can’t really imagine many scenarios in which Trudeau could beat Doom, but I suppose that this qualifies. The only other one that might come close would be a match between Doom and Trudeau’s favourite comic character, who happens to be the Hulk. But that’s by proxy. And it’d be a tough call even then. Still, it’s Trudeau’s week. No grudge.

Bonus Question!

Doom versus Trudeau in a drama battle?

Trudeau was a drama teacher. Doom exudes drama. I'd generally tend to give the win to the doctor, but I think that a real drama student might actually lose marks for acting like that. This one's open to interpretation.

Savory Sense

Rap me in your sly embrace.

Entrap with trances, glee, and grace.

A frosty moon that rises soon

Shall dance with summer's final trace.

Spice the scents that stain the skies.

Entice with tricks and shifty sighs

Quiescent tones that chill the bones

Lie deep within candescent cries.

Seize me with a sultry breeze.

Exult before the season flees.

Assault my sight with stubborn light

That warmly wards off future's freeze.

Subtly have the shadows massed.

Their young domain is cool and vast.

Maintain your grasp through autumn's rasp

And hold your heat unto the last.

Sedaris and the Spider

I just read the first issue of that new Spider-Man series I mentioned a couple of weeks ago in the context of its thematic resonance with Iron Man, and it did turn out to feature Peter Parker's jocular acceptance of the epithet "a poor man's Tony Stark". But he did make a point of wearing cheaper suits. Though he was in his civilian guise at the time, I suppose that that would apply to his superhero attire too. 

I've been watching a few episodes of this one show and vaguely noticing that one of the stars was someone I recognised. During the last one, I discovered that she was Amy Sedaris, which led me to think, "Huh. Apparently, I enjoy Amy Sedaris". This was news to me. Then she surprised me again by making a guest appearance on a different show I watched right afterwards.

Anyway, enjoy your bird meats!

Bonus Question! 

Best stranger with candy? Mr. Biscuits. 

Of Hawks and Hunters

I just caught this season's "Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D." premiere. It continues to improve, and it seems to be doing so in some especially obvious ways now. The focus on the whole Inhuman phenomenon is pleasing. This also serves to contribute to a tone that's distinct from the fantastical feel of the Marvel films and the ground level of the Netflix branch of this franchise that "Daredevil" has owned with such aplomb.

As the program continues to banish blandness, stronger personalities come to the fore. Fitz is focused on attaining a different type of awesomeness, and the venerable comic character Mockingbird is now apparently a mainstay. While her partner Lance Hunter takes his name from a figure of less renown, he feels more like a representation of the comics' Hawkeye than Renner's somewhat stoic persona, which contributes to a growing resonance between the show's atmosphere and that of its source material. I did recently have a dream in which Renner featured, though. The details aren't too clear, but I awoke with the idea that he'd probably make a decent Wildcat in a DC film. But I don't think that he even got the chance to play that role in the dream. 

The choice of the "Lance Hunter" name still seems slightly odd. It has a rough and reckless sort of charm that feels better for this character than it does for the less roguish depiction that originally appeared in the comics, and it certainly has a stronger ring than "Clint Barton". That's not a particularly dull name, but if it hadn't already been given to Hawkeye, it could easily go to a less adventurous type of gentleman. Actually, I could imagine an owner of that name who looked like Jeremy Renner. He wouldn't really be the kind of person that Renner generally plays. He'd just be a guy on the street with a Renner face and a name that did nothing to add to his appeal.

But here's the thing. While "Lance Hunter" sounds pretty great, the actor's name is even better. "Nick Blood" feels like the appellation of an adventurer a Lance Hunter would idolise. He could've just kept it for the show. Like Bernie Mac on "The Bernie Mac Show". Or something. "Bernie Mac" is a decent name too, but its attributes are perhaps less suited here. 

Bonus Question! 

Best hawk? Tobias. 

Do Whatever Some Iron Does

Brian Michael Bendis was the writer who made me want to read Spider­Man comics. It was fairly early in the run of his original "Ultimate Spider­Man" series when I saw an issue at some big hardware store or something on an errand run with my father. I didn't generally gravitate towards the Ultimate comics or any of Spidey's various books on my trips to the comic shop, but this one nestled neatly among the magazines by the cash desk on a completely unrelated excursion. I wasn't going to turn down a bonus comic.

I don't think that Peter even appeared as Spider­-Man in the issue. He was just talking to Mary­-Jane for most of it. But something about the writing style rapped me hard. When I finally started to pay a bit of attention to the names of the people who were making the comics in later life, Bendis's easily secured a place of prominence in my mind.

And now he's writing Iron Man's new series. That seems appealing. But it's also amusing now, for the latest Peter Parker volume, with which Brian has nothing particular to do, seems to be pushing its protagonist into a Tony Stark role. It's got a focus on Pete's giant science corporation, his adventures around the world, his gadgetry, and his celebrity status. And as Spider­-Man acquires all of these aspects that are traditionally associated with Iron Man, Bendis's run on the latter character is set to prominently feature Mary­-Jane. Decent trade? 

Bonus Question! 

Best iron? Sky. 

One's a Zombie. One's a Demon. They Fight Crime!

My affection for Gaiman's interpretation of Lucifer and the consequent Vertigo series by Mike Carey, which featured the titular being on existential quests through the cosmos, isn't something that can warrant much doubt. The erstwhile hell lord's new television program, which I shall at least surely sample, doesn't really appear to take much from those comics beyond the protagonist. It looks to be some form of supernatural procedural show.

But last year also saw televisin adapt an epic Vertigo fantasy I adored into an almost unrecognisable form. That was "iZombie", and it turned out to be enjoyable by itself. Like the new "Lucifer" show, it took a sardonic protagonist away from most of its source's uncanny trappings into a somewhat more grounded setting with a focus on solving crimes amidst ambient weirdness and commendable character work. 

It doesn't sound eminently appealing as a pitch, but "iZombie" was one of my favourite comic book shows anyway. I don't know whether "Lucifer" will reach that level, but it shouldn't be too far below.

Bonus Question!

Best existential quest through the cosmos? I don't know, but it probably has something to do with the Silver Surfer. 

Dark Side Style

Obviously, the new "Star Wars" stuff was going to enter my life. That galaxy was one of my early loves, and the movie is something I shall doubtless see. That was never in question, but despite my assiduous affection for the franchise and my more recent experiences with the fresh comics and other stories that have been created in advance of the imminent movie, I hadn't really thought about the actual film. But something I just heard did catch my attention.

For some reason, I like Adam Driver. I've surely touched on this before. I was aware that he was connected with the franchise in some way. I probably assumed that he was playing a sort of scoundrel in the tradition of Han Solo, for that's rather close to the types of roles he's generally assigned. But now I know that he's playing an aspirant Sith. Though it might not seem like the most natural fit, it feels good anyway. And it provides a kind of antagonist that hasn't really been prominent in the films before.

The Sith aesthetic often conveyed a sense of arcane mysticism and sorcerous debauchery, but much of that was explored more in other media. Most of the order's representatives in the movies didn't always appear to be enjoying their status. Palpatine certainly did at the end of "Revenge", but those scenes of mad laughter and lightning unleashed came after ages of hiding his delightful malevolence behind a facade of staid political ideals.

But this new guy clearly wants to be there. Apparently, he's trying to be the next Darth Vader. Even Anakin didn't want to be Darth Vader!

Now the films have a prime villain who embraces the dark side by choice instead of chance, and he's blatantly proud of it. Vader wore a helmet despite discomfort because he needed it to live. Driver's Kylo Ren, a reasonably attractive and healthy young man, apparently just donned his mask because it felt like the dark side thing to do. Sith swag! That's what the world needs. 

Bonus Question!

Best mad emperor? Nero. Somewhat like Palpatine with less subtlety and more perversion. Presumably, he was Sith too. 

Fantastish

“Fantastic Four” is the first film I can remember during which I actually walked out.
But it was just to use the washroom.
In fairness, I did get there in time for the start of the show, which isn’t eminently common for me. 

I think that that balanced things out in the end.

Josh Trank’s take on the quartet reminded me of Burton on Batman. Like the older auteur’s rendition of the Dark Knight’s legend, this film seemed to be made by an individual who was more interested in doing his own thing than he was on maintaining especial resonance with the source material from which the story took its trappings. Obviously, this is apart from the liberties that tend to get taken in most adaptations. Even particularly faithful translations like “Watchmen” and “Iron Man” change all kinds of things from the page for the screen. I don’t have a problem with that. An adaptation’s its own thing. I didn’t have a problem with this either, though. But I almost feel as though things might have felt cleaner if Trank made his own science fiction tale while someone with a greater passion for Marvel’s First Family took that franchise on. But this is coming from a guy who prefers the products of Joel Schumacher’s fervent adoration of Batman over the respectable Tim Burton movies that happened to feature a comic character about whom the maker was ambivalent. The difference in directorial attachment is not explicitly tied to my taste here, but it might serve to reinforce it.

Though it might not be the "Fantastic Four" film I would have chosen, I felt no aversion, and there were some things I definitely liked. Many of them were at the beginning. Victor shone especially brightly in his introduction. The hair might have helped. He was also listening to my favourite Vivaldi song at the time. You know the one. It’s probably yours too.

His eventual form looked slightly odd before he threw on that cloak. Like a Halloween version of the Silver Surfer. Which . . . They’re going to want to introduce that guy at some stage, aren’t they? It might be hard to distinguish now. But I did hear that an earlier writer’s treatment of the film chose to make Victor into a composite of his comic self and the Surfer. Abandoned idea. Still seems like a vaguely interesting coincidence. “Vaguely interesting” is probably a decent way to describe the overall film, though.

I did like what they took from the Ultimate version of the team. A lot of that was at the beginning. The beginning of the series was where that book seemed strongest too. Pretty solid cast. I can’t really recall when I developed an affection for Miles Teller. I’m not terribly aware of my original reasons for it either. Maybe he's picking up a bit of the slack from Shia as the younger Stevens brother drifts into a more esoteric existence. But I was most excited to see his interpretation of Reed Richards. Jamie Bell's Ben Grimm had a deviant touch of merit. And I did like the retention of the eyes in his Thing form. I distinctly recall a conversation in an early issue of “Ultimate Fantastic Four” wherein Johnny pointed that out to Ben after his transformation. I still miss Chris Evans’s portrayal of Torch, though. He always excelled at those types of characters, and I think that his acquisition of the Captain America role marked a transition away from that.

The final scene did serve to highlight the sense of heart that I liked about the film’s opening. It also included a joke about “Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place”, which doesn’t seem like something that happens much in mass media. But it’s a Ryan Reynolds reference, and that dude loves superheroes. He wants to play all of them. Thus it seems appropriate for his presence to be felt here despite his total lack of involvement. Ooh. He would make a decent Johnny Storm, though. But Jordan was fine. If I had to complain about something, it’d be the hair, which he shared with Evans’s version. I really think that Reynolds could have been the one to capture the Torch’s follicular flare.

Bonus Question!

Michael B. Jordan vrsus Michael Jordan? 

I don't know. One can fly on fire, but the other's got mad hops. Strangely, the latter's the only one with actual experience in fighting aliens at this point. Maybe he can teach the younger Mike about that in advance of the extraterrestrial threats that inevitably enter the lives of all who are associated with the Fantastic Four. 

Dink Pix

I saw "Pixels". I do things like that.

I'm not entirely sure that I had enough awareness before to know with great certainty that it was a live film, but I'm alright to go in with a bit of mystery. There were some nice surprises among the cast too. Kevin James is never unwelcome in cinema, and such appearances seem to be growing commoner. I remember when their rarity seemed to warrant appreciation by itself.

Apart from Sandler, Dinklage was the only other name on the cast list in my head, and my knowledge of that mainly came from complaints of people who expressed shock at the man's presence in a film of perceived mediocrity. But this isn't even the worst Dinklage film I've seen. In fairness, it's not the best either. That spot's comfortably filled by "Days of Future Past", which featured him in the role of a villain in the Seventies. In this one, the antagonist he portrays just acts as though he were in the Seventies. 

Bonus Question! 

Pac-Man versus Q*bert? I think that they might actually get along quite well. Pac-Man has a decent look for a solar deity, and Q likes to hang around pyramids, which means that he probably has some familiarity with gods of dubious humanity who like to consume ghosts. 

Cats and Cheese! Dragons and Hair!

The new "Dragonball" movie was playing at a local cinema recently, and there was this lazy cat god who got dragged in to save the world through judicious use of culinary bribes. He happened to be an alien cat god. I suppose that that adds efficacy to the whole food strategy. You've got the classic trope of feline gluttony in concert with the eager sense of discovery that comes from an extraterrestrial being's first exposure to new sensory experiences. But it did feel weird when one of his featured discoveries was cheese. I don't know. It just seemed incongruous for a cat to be unaware of cheese. A cat god at that. I mean . . . I suppose that he wasn't actually a god of cats. A deity with duties that relate to cats and their myriad interests. He was just a god who happened to be a cat. Still. Bit of oddness.

But do you know what didn't seem incongruous at all? The fact that the protagonist's new ultimate form was distinguished primarily by blue hair. If Strong Bad has taught the world anything about anime, it is the utter importance of blue hair, a thing that must be had.

Bonus Question!

Best Strong Bad anime lesson apart from blue hair? Shiny eyes.

Bond on Bond

I saw "Spy". Good times. But I did wonder why Jude Law suppressed his English accent. It seems like an odd thing to do for someone who's essentially playing a parody of James Bond. Peter Serafinowicz, playing a different version of the same archetype, gave a  vocal performance that carried extra doses of strangeness to my ear. In additon to being British, he's a dude who's known for his naturally glorious voice. The man even followed in the James Earl Jones tradition of providing the speech for a Sith Lord with another's body. But his own tones are set aside in service of some generically foreign thing.

Whatever. The guys were still great. No real detractions. It just felt slightly wasteful.

I think that Statham kept his natural voice, though. But isn't he least known for his elocution?

Bonus Question!

Best bond? Gleipnir.

Shot Foot

New "Terminator" movie. I just . . . That foot thing. All of the technology that goes into robots to allow them to pass as humans . . . He can't even give a token attempt at mimicking pain, that basic component of the living experience, when he gets shot in the foot? That's what reveals his automation? That stoic facade without the barest acknowledgement of a bullet in the foot. Or like . . . Acknowledgement of anything at all.

Whatever.

It was still a fair film. I've never paid the closest attention to the franchise, but I'd probably place it second or third. Obviously, the first sequel is an unimpeachable classic, and the Christian Bale one is at least nice conceptually. And it has Christian Bale. Ooh! And that Russian kid. And I think that it might have been part of that push for that Sam Worthington fellow? But that guy never really jumped out at me. That's not really a point in either column. Maybe it was part of a Russian kid push too, though. It was right after "Star Trek".

Oh, and J.K. Simmons is great. That's not too surprising. But his character happens to be the calmest, most reasonable guy around, which is somewhat less typical.

Anyway, this securely gets my acclaim for the best Jennifer Lawrence performance in a time travel adventure since "Days of Future Past". In fairness, my greater fondness for the "X­-Men" film doubtlessly has more to do with my preference for the franchise than it does with the actual presence of Jennifer Lawrence, who happens to be inconspicuously absent here. 

Bonus Question! 

Best Worthington? Warren III. 

Ted Talk

I managed to see “Ted 2” as it seemed to be preparing for its theatrical exit. It was down the hall on the right. That’s often a sign.

Do you remember “Bicentennial Man”? My memories of going to see it with my father are quite fond, though I’m not sure that it was widely acclaimed among the general populace. It was one of those Robin Williams films that didn’t really take particular pains to hold especially close to what a random person might seek from Robin Williams. Anyway, “Ted 2” is basically like “Bicentennial Man”. But instead of being a Robin Williams movie that doesn’t always explicitly feel like one, it’s a Seth MacFarlane thing that definitively delivers on what one would expect from that.

Bonus Question! 

Best Ted? Theodore Roosevelt, 26th President of these Unites States! 

A Siesta for Saga

I believe that I've documented my experiences with Brian Vaughan's "Saga" around here to some degree in the past. Like many readers, I'm left with a mood of excited curiosity when I reach the story's regular hiatus points, though I tend to arrive at those points later than others. That's because it's generally passed from the fore of my mind before its resumption. I've had similar experiences with half seasons of television shows in the past.

Anyway, I was tardy to the party again, but I came upon the urge to read more of Vaughan's cosmic opus before the end of his recent batch. I basically caught up right on time to be ready for the final issue of this run, which was just released. This feels new to me. I doubt that my satisfaction with the actual comic will, though. 

Bonus Question! 

Why is Windows skipping from version 8 to 10?

Because 9 was eaten! By 7!  

Or the correct version of that joke! 

A Sum of Sams and a Mess of Maxes

Though I never really had any great investment in it, "Spawn" was a franchise that drifted around my periphery. My childhood began in the Nineties. It seemed inevitable. But I only read an actual comic with the character quite recently. I picked it up out of vague curiosity after I heard that the series was bringing back the character who originally bore the title. 

It's alright. Whatever. I've read a few issues since. The current arc began with a heavy emphasis on Sam and Twitch, two police officers. I was already somewhat aware of their ancillary status in the franchise, but whenever I heard their names, I was reminded of "Sam and Max", another property that dwelt around the fringes of my childhood. These characters also happened to be lawmen. They were anthropomorphic animals, but that did nothing to weaken their dedication to serve and protect. I suppose that it didn't do anything to heighten it either. My firmest memory of it seems to be related to my brother's recital of the cartoon's theme song, which I can't even recall terribly well at all. I do remember that the latter name was sometimes replaced with “Mark” in the mouth of my sibling, a reference to the brother of our neighbour Sam. Another level for the tune to work on.

Anyway, my reading of "Spawn" revealed that the given name of the man who bears the nickname "Twitch" is actually "Max". Does that not serve to provide my customary confusion between the two duos with a little extra dose of vindication? 

I don't know. Maybe it doesn't. Probably. But it feels like that anyway.

Bonus Question!

Best Sam? Hain. 

Theme Parks of Past and Future

I was obviously going to see "Jurassic World". I've seen the first on several occasions, including random cinema viewings, though I did miss its recent wide revival. The second still holds a pretty special place in my heart, which isn't hurt by its focus on Jeff Goldblum and the fact that it's the basis for a fairly clear and early memory of good times at the movies. My aversion to the third one was apparently strong enough to inadvertently associate it with a distastefully weird stage of my life instead of the era in which it was actually released. I honestly just discovered that it actually came out in 2001 after "World" hit screens. In fairness, my antipathy could only have been heightened by the lack of Ian Malcolm, who represented the franchise most vividly in my mind. There's even a part in the third movie where the woman who planned the expedition is chastised for excluding that chaos theorist and his intimate knowledge of the featured island, which only made his absence feel more apparent.

I didn't expect him to be in this one, however, and Chris Pratt would have been enough of a draw on the acting side if I'd needed one. But I didn't. It's a new "Jurassic Park" film, and it's not the third one.

But the particular source of my most pleasant surprise lay elsewhere. The Pratt plot was a fairly standard action movie thing, which brought no complaints from me, but I was especially drawn to the kids' adventure through a wonderfully realised theme park that rapidly descended into a state of panic and peril. The emphasis on that atmosphere was welcome in an entry of a franchise that only touched on it briefly in its initial installment despite its very name. At the least, the delivery of that ambience matched its transmission during some of the strongest moments of "Tomorrowland", though it differed in execution, partially by dint of decreased idealism in its execution. It didn't feel like a pristine portrait or a cynical caricature. It felt like a candid photograph, casually conveying all aspects of the scene with reasonable neutrality. 

The juvenile perspective also felt fresh and distinct from that of the children in the first two movies. Thinking about it now, I wonder if the scarcity of youth in the third one may have made it even blander for me.

Oh. And there's also the theme song. That was on point here. Ever awesome. 

Bonus Question!

Best T. Rex? Marc Bolan.